When I grow up I want to be in a sandwich or a metal band

I had the violent displeasure today of (part)consuming what may be the worst pork sandwich I have ever had. I purchased this wretched morsel from a café near me that sells nothing else other than roast pork in rolls. How bad can it be? Well the stale baguette (they seem to have perfected the art of making them come out of the oven that way) was the worst bit, then the dry pork (I’m assuming it was pork, hard to tell) was the worst bit too, after the apple sauce (seemingly made be leaving the apples in pool of saliva to dissolve) it all went down hill (or to be more specific, in the bin).

How anyone could treat pig, not to mention food in general, with such disrespect is beyond me. To celebrate this most auspicious of occasions I’ve selected a few tasty pig related tracks for your entertainment.

War Pigs. The Faith No More version here, but there’s a multitude of excellent covers of the seminal Sabbath masterwork.

Piggy, the foreboding industrial ‘ballad’ from Nine Inch Nails’ astounding The Downward Spiral.

Some delightful, nosebleed inducing Grind from Pig Destroyer.

The fantastically silly, Scientology baiting Big Fat Pig from Clutch’s otherwise less than inspiring Jam Room.

May the pork be with you…

Since Faith No More reformed I’ve been musing on whether their legendary status means that I should like them (or at least as much as I did 10 years ago). So I embarked on a audio oddesy, trawling through their back catalogue, to analyse what I really think of them.

Listening to Faith No More is like listening to a mishmash of pretty much all mainstream rock that came after them. This is sometimes a little off putting. For example, there were times when listening to Angel Dust that I felt like I was listening to Linkin Park…eeek! This is not an uncommon problem, and is a testament to their influence. The problem is, a lot of the music that the inspired (not least the turgid rot of Nu-metal) is utter toss. I don’t want to listen to it, or even feel like I’m listening to it!

This is not all bad news. Some of my favourite bands are heavily influenced by Faith No More (The Dillinger Escape Plan for example). Also, due to their effortless ability to churn out stonking tunes, their somewhat less talented offspring are left confounded in their ability to write and record sogs such as Falling to Pieces and A Small Victory.

Conclusion: Faith No More are still ace, even if they have been tarnished by their own success.

Anyway, today’s forgotten tune is off King for a Day, Fool for a Lifetime
. Like all the best Faith No More songs, it obstinately doesn’t do what you expect it to:

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